I decided to make last week’s message on wisdom the first in a series I have called Fortifying the Family. Each message will have something in it that can fortify or strengthen your family.

Henry Ford, founder of the Ford Motor Company said, “You can’t build a reputation on what you are going to do.” Benjamin Franklin said, “It takes many good deeds to build a good reputation, and only one bad one to lose it.” This evening we are going to talk about your reputation

Your reputation is what people think of you based on what they know about you. This evening we are going to learn how you can gain an honourable reputation.

Transition

Proverbs 1:8-9 make three statements that give us helpful information about gaining an honourable reputation.

The Requisite Must be Fulfilled (Requisite = absolute necessity)

  1. Fathers must instruct their children
    1. Interestingly, the word “instruct” refers to discipline, chastening, or correction. It is that which changes the direction of another through instruction or chastening. It binds or restricts.
    2. If you are a dad, God does not want you to be a passive pushover. He does not want you to give in to all the wishes of your children. Dad’s must not be softies.
    3. On the other hand, God strictly warns fathers not to be harsh or to provoke their children (Eph 6:4). Anger is not the answer. When we get angry with our children, we sin against them and against God.
    4. As fathers, our goal must be to change the sinful direction of our children so that they desire to do right. This involves clear, loving, biblical instruction reinforced with discipline. The most effective parents lead by a godly example. Your children must see Christ in your life!
    5. Be consistent! Few parental faults frustrate a child more than inconsistency. If one time their disobedience is okay and the next time it is punished, they feel frustrated and confused.
    6. When a child does wrong, show them in the Bible what God says about their wrong. Help them see that they have disobeyed both you and God. Once they repent, point them to Christ for forgiveness and cleansing (1Jn 1:9). Then pray with them and forgive them.
    7. When fathers fail to lovingly and biblically instruct, children are left to their own sinful will.
  2. Mother must give laws to their children
    1. The word “law” refers to teaching that gives direction in life. It deals mainly with what is right and wrong.
    2. While God holds father primarily responsible for family instruction and discipline, mother is his helper. She must not be a passive pushover either.
    3. Mother, the teaching you give your children is pointing them in a direction for life. You must be positive that you are pointing them in God’s direction.
      1. Mothers must teach their children the difference between right and wrong. Teach them from the Bible why sin is wrong.
      2. Mothers should teach their children the Bible. Do not just teach them Bible stories, teach them how to find principles in the Bible so they will grow spiritually.
      3. Teach them how to pray. Help them learn that prayer is not just reciting a poem, it is talking to our Creator God!
      4. Mothers should teach their children character. Character is the determination to do what is right even when it is not convenient. D. L. Moody said, “Character is what you are in the dark.” In other words, “Character is what you do when no one else is looking.” Someone else gave this definition, “Godly character is consistently doing the right thing at the right time in the right way for the right reason.” Character qualities include honesty, faithfulness, loyalty to God, punctuality, respect, self-discipline, consistency, and reliability. Character is more easily caught than taught. You must develop godly character yourself before you can teach your children.
    4. When mothers fail to biblically teach, children are left to learn how to live life from friends, media, and the world.

The Requirement Must be Obeyed

  1. God requires children to hear instruction
    1. The word “hear” means to listen to or obey.
      1. Obey your father because you are his offspring.
      2. Obey your father because God commands it here and in other Bible verses. For example, (Ephesians 6:1) Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right.
    2. To hear or obey is to do what you are told without delay, without excuses, without complaining, and without rebellion. A rebellious attitude will destroy you. (Proverbs 29:1) He, that being often reproved hardeneth his neck, shall suddenly be destroyed, and that without remedy.
    3. When given a command, if you pout or grumble or get angry, you have disobeyed both your parent and God. If you struggle with a bad attitude when told to do something, ask God to help you rule your spirit. (Proverbs 25:28) He that hath no rule over his own spirit is like a city that is broken down, and without walls. God tells us in (Proverbs 16:32) He that is slow to anger is better than the mighty; and he that ruleth his spirit than he that taketh a city.
    4. Remember that instruction includes discipline. No one enjoys discipline, but God says it is necessary to train us to do right (Heb 12:11). When you get disciplined, thank God that you have a parent who loves you enough to discipline you. Learn from what you did wrong. Humble yourself before God and your parent. Confess your wrong to God. Seek His forgiveness and your parent’s forgiveness.
  2. God requires children to not forsake teaching
    1. The word “forsake” means to leave, forsake, reject, cease, abandon, or quit.
    2. Children, you must not leave or quit the biblical teachings you receive from your parents. Your parents are God’s mentors for your life.
    3. Preacher Harry Ironside wrote, “Young people who profess allegiance to the Lord, but are impudent [rude] and disrespectful to those over them in the home are a sad reproach to the name of Him whom they are supposed to serve.”

The Reward Will Surely Follow Obedience

  1. Instruction and teaching will go with you in life
    1. The word “they” in verse 9 speaks of the instruction and law of the parents.
    2. Young people who obey and keep the godly training received in their home will take that training with them for the rest of their lives. I thank God for the biblical teaching, chastening, instruction, and character-building training I received in my youth. My regret is that I did not accept it more quickly and more fully.
  2. Instruction and teaching will honour your life
    1. When biblical instruction and teaching are obeyed and kept, God promises that they will honour your life. God said, They will be an ornament of grace on your head and chains around your neck.
    2. Obeying and keeping biblical training will give you an honourable reputation in the eyes of men and also in the sight of God. That honourable reputation will decorate you like a crown of a champion and like chains about the neck of a prince. An honourable reputation is priceless!

Conclusion

Parents, if you want your children to gain an honourable reputation, you MUST instruct, discipline, and teach them. If you fail, they will have a difficult time in life and may never have an honourable reputation. Young people, if your parents are trying to give you biblical training, thank God for it, obey completely, and never turn from it. If your parents are not doing a very good job of biblical training, ask God to help them and ask God to help you discipline yourself to do right and develop your own godly character. Remember, you CAN wear the crown and chain of an honourable reputation, but it will take parental training, obedience, and purpose in your heart.

Song: Teach Me Thy Way, O Lord – 337
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An Honourable Reputation
17 January 2015 PM – Proverbs 1:8-9 – Fortifying the Family – Scott Childs