In Proverbs 25:28, we read, “He that hath no rule over his own spirit is like a city that is broken down, and without walls.” In ancient Israel, enemy countries frequently invaded the land, killing, raping, capturing and plundering everywhere they went. One of the few places of refuge was inside walled cities. If the residents failed to keep their city walls in good repair, an enemy could easily overpower them. Solomon equated this to a person who ruled well his spirit. He points out that if we fail to rule our spirit, our lives will be as defenceless as a city with broken down walls. The devil will easily defeat us and rob us of our usefulness and joy.

We are beginning a series of messages that I have entitled Ruling Your Spirit. To rule is to control, but what is your spirit? It is not referring to the Holy Spirit. Rather, it refers to your inner self. Ruling your spirit is controlling how your inner self acts. To live a fruitful Christian life, you must rule your attitudes, desires, tongue, temper, thoughts, emotions, time, submission, appetite, spending, recreation, envy, pride, etc. Read 1 Peter 3:4.

Transition

A quiet spirit is a good attitude. I want us to begin this series by learning God’s way to rule our attitudes.

Review the Problem

  1. What do we know about attitudes?
    1. We often have good attitudes that are sweet, cheerful, pleasant, helpful and kind.
    2. However, we sometimes have bad attitudes. People with bad attitudes are unpleasant to be around. They may be grumpy, mean, sharp, harsh, irritable or unkind.
    3. Bad attitudes are numerous, but here are nine bad attitudes that are common.
      1. A rebellious attitude. When we say, “I don’t like that” or “I’m not going to do that” or “you can’t make me”, these are rebellious attitudes. Prodigal son.
      2. A bitter attitude. Bitterness is that attitude of resentment when you feel your spouse mistreated you, or when your parent has neglected you, or when you did not receive what you think you deserved.
      3. A negative attitude or pessimistic attitude is always expecting the worst. Everything is bad. It won’t work.
      4. A discontent attitude. This is being dissatisfied, always wanting something better, never happy with others. It may be grumbling or complaining.
      5. A bossy attitude. This is telling others what to do when you are not in charge. Common in siblings.
      6. A disrespectful attitude. This is speaking to a parent or other authority in a rude, unkind or sharp manner. It is failing to show proper respect.
      7. A blaming attitude. Some people just never want to take the blame for anything they do. It is always someone else’s fault.
      8. A selfish attitude. Me first. Biggest piece. Best place. My way. I don’t want to share. I deserve it.
      9. A harsh attitude. This describes you if you speak with a sharp, irritated, impatient tone.
  2. Bad attitudes cause big problems.
    1. No one enjoys being around a person who has a bad attitude. They are like a plague. They displease God.
    2. Bad attitudes harm relationships. They ruin friendships. They will give you a bad reputation. They will greatly hinder your success in life.

Recognise the Problem. Is this a problem in my life?

  1. Personal attitude problems can be hard to see.
    1. Skunks live in North America and parts of South America. They are about the size of a cat, but in self-defence, they spray a musk from their rear up to 4.5 m that is so offensive that it can make you vomit. Yet the skunk does not mind his own smell.
    2. So it is with attitudes. We get used to the way we are, and we may not even know that we have a bad attitude.
  2. Ask yourself, “Do I have an attitude problem?”
    1. Asking this is painful and humiliating, but it is important. Go through the sample list above.
    2. If married, ask your spouse about your attitudes. If a child, ask your parents. You may even ask a friend.
    3. If you discover that you have an unruled attitude, do not deny it. Admit it to yourself and to God.
    4. We will never rule a bad attitude until we humbly admit that we have an attitude problem. This is not easy, but it is essential.

Research the Problem. What does the Bible say about it?

  1. Bible examples of bad attitudes
    1. Joseph’s brothers (Gen 37)
    2. Absalom as he sat at the city gate (2Sam 15:2)
    3. Jonah fled and later got bitter when God forgave.
    4. The prodigal son (Luke 15:19-32)
  2. Here are a few Bible verses that address attitudes.
    1. (1 Peter 3:4) “But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.“
    2. (1 Samuel 15:23) “For rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft, and stubbornness is as iniquity and idolatry. Because thou hast rejected the word of the LORD, he hath also rejected thee from being king.“
    3. (Colossians 3:19) “Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.“
    4. (Hebrews 13:5) “Let your conversation be without covetousness; and be content with such things as ye have: for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee.“
    5. (Philippians 2:14) “Do all things without murmurings and disputings:“

Rule the Problem

When we see that we have an unruled attitude, what are we to do about it?

  1. We need to go to God for help.
    1. We must confess our bad attitude to God as sin.
    2. (Proverbs 25:28) “He that hath no rule over his own spirit is like a city that is broken down, and without walls.” A ruled spirit is a restrained or controlled spirit. The root of this word simply means to stop something from occurring. To do this, we need more than just self-discipline. Attitudes we have lived with for years may be extremely difficult to rule.
    3. In the New Testament, God calls this idea of ruling our spirit temperance, meaning self-control.
    4. Temperance is a fruit of the Spirit. (Galatians 5:22-23) “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.” The Holy Spirit produces this in the life of a yielded, obedient Christian.
    5. Peter lists temperance in his list of qualities that we must add to our faith that we might be fruitful Christians, (2 Peter 1:5-8).
    6. What we need is Spirit-enabled self-control.
  2. Practice Spirit-enabled self-control
    1. We must walk in the Spirit. (Galatians 5:16) “This I say then, Walk in the Spirit, and ye shall not fulfil the lust of the flesh.” To do this, we must stay in fellowship with Him and depend on Him for enabling.
    2. Think before you respond. (Proverbs 15:28) “The heart of the righteous studieth to answer…“
    3. Each time the bad attitude surfaces, we must ask the Holy Spirit to enable us to respond right. Seek to have the kind of attitude Christ had on earth. (Philippians 2:5)
    4. If you fail, apologise to those who observed it. Ask them to forgive you. If they are Christians, ask them to pray for you and with you about it.

Conclusion

Remember, God said that if you do not rule your spirit including your attitudes, you are like a city with a broken wall. The enemy as direct access into your life. If you have unruled attitudes, do not ignore them. Your spiritual health and reputation depend on it.

Song: O I Want to Be Like Jesus – 320
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Ruling Your Spirit: Attitudes
21 August 2022 PM – 1Peter 3:4 – RuleSpirit22 – Scott Childs