Before a person will let you help them, they must trust you. You must earn his or her respect. If he does not respect and value your opinion, you will have very little positive influence on his life. This is true in our witness, in our ministries, and especially in our families. Many children have become rebellious because they did not respect their parents.

Transition

In our text this morning, Paul reveals to us how he and Silas earned the respect of the Thessalonian people. As we examine what they did, we will learn how we too may earn respect so that we can be effective witnesses, teachers, preachers and parents.

Be Gentle (2:7)

  1. The Description
    1. To be “gentle” is to be mild, kind, warm, and friendly. It describes one who is easy to talk to. This does not imply weak and lacking leadership. Instead it describes a sweet likeable spirit.
    2. Paul was gentle like a nurse who cherished her children. The word “cherish” means to spend tender time with. Paul spent gentle time with them just as a mother does with her baby.
  2. The Application
    1. To earn the respect of those to whom we minister (including our children), we must be gentle.
    2. People naturally pull away from those who are harsh, sharp, unkind, or unfriendly.
    3. The opposite is also true. People are drawn towards those who are mild, kind, warm and friendly. So, being gentle will help us earn the respect of listeners and of our children.

Be Loving (2:8)

  1. The Description
    1. We must define the phrase “affectionately desirous”. We know the word “affection” speaks of loving feelings. Thus, these words describe the tender, loving desire that Paul and Silas had for the spiritual welfare of these people.
    2. Paul did not just long to preach the gospel to them, but he also wanted to give of himself to help them spiritually. He was willing to sacrifice for them. His witnessing and preaching was motivated by love. He put his whole heart into his ministry to others. He genuinely loved those he was trying to reach.
  2. The Application
    1. Love is a key factor in earning the respect of another person. When a person senses that you love him, he will be far more likely to receive you and your message for him.
    2. Love is a choice. Love is the sacrificial giving of yourself to meet the needs of another without demanding anything in return.

Be Thoughtful (2:9)

  1. The Description
    1. “Labour” speaks of hard work that extremely wearies the body. “Travail”, being similar, speaks of hard and difficult labour causing hardship and distress.
    2. Working a secular job to put food on the table and pay the bills plus preaching the gospel was very tiring.
    3. Notice why Paul worked instead of collecting an offering. He did not want to be chargeable to any of them. The word “chargeable” simply means to be a burden.
    4. Jesus told us in Luke 10:7 that a “labourer is worthy of his hire”. Paul could have asked for pay for his preaching, but he chose not to so that he would not be a burden on those persecuted new believers. He was being thoughtful.
  2. The Application
    1. People appreciate thoughtfulness. Your thoughtfulness may be a phone call, a visit, praying with the person, sharing garden produce, spending time with them or just listening to their burdens. In the home it may be lending a helping hand, giving a hug, showing appreciation, playing a game with your child, or spending special individual time with each child.
    2. Sometimes thoughtfulness costs us much as it did Paul. Other times it just takes a bit of our time. Either way, being thoughtful will earn respect.

Be Godly (2:10)

  1. The Description
    1. Paul asked the Thessalonians again to recall they way he and the other missionaries had acted while they were with them.
    2. Paul described his actions in three ways.
      1. They were holy or pious. They showed great respect for God and spiritual things.
      2. They were just or righteous. Their conduct was right in the sight of God.
      3. They were unblameable or blameless. They did not do anything that would discredit them.
    3. The missionaries were patterning their lives after God. They were trying to be godly.
  2. The Application
    1. The way that we act has a huge impact on our respect. If our talk or our dress or our attitude or our actions are not holy, right, and blameless, we lose their respect.
    2. While this is true in every relationship, it is especially true with your children. If they see that our life does not match our lips, we lose their respect. It is not easy to always live the kind of godly life we ought to live, but it ought to be our daily passion. If we fail, we must humble ourselves and apologize to those we hurt.
    3. Many parents have lost the respect of their children because of their ungodly actions and will never regain it until they both change and humbly apologize.

Be Caring (2:11-12)

  1. The Description
    1. Paul treated the Thessalonians as a loving father treats his children – with genuine care. His treatment included exhorting, comforting, and charging them.
    2. Paul cared so much about those new believers that he determined to give them sound direction. He wanted to help them make right choices.
      1. He exhorted them, begging them to do right and encouraging them in right actions.
      2. He comforted them, by calming their fears and encouraging them to trust God.
      3. He charged them, or testified to them about how to live the Christian life.
  2. The Application
    1. Parents who let their children do as they please do not really care about how their children will turn out. Many children choose what they eat, what they wear, where they go, when they go to bed, and who their friends are. School-age children are not yet adults. They need parental leadership to help them make wise choices.
    2. Those who truly care about others will speak up and do what they can to point them in a direction that honours the Lord. To earn the privilege of influencing others, they must know that we truly care about them.

Conclusion

Paul and Silas earned the Thessalonian believers respect by Being Gentle, by Being Loving, by Being Thoughtful, by Being Godly, and by Being Caring.

God wants you to influence others as well in your witnessing, teaching, preaching and parenting. To do so, you must earn their respect. If you try to witness to someone who has lost respect for you due to your poor testimony, he will ignore you as a hypocrite. As a parent, if you lose your child’s respect, he or she will likely grow up to break your heart.

If as a witness or as a parent you have not been as gentle, loving, thoughtful, godly and caring as God expects you to be, God wants to help you change. Why not ask Him to help you? If you have lost respect due to a bad testimony, humbly apologize to them.

Song: I Surrender All – 394
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Earning Respect
7 February 2016 AM – 1Th 2:7-12 – 1Th2016 – Scott Childs